Introduction

Planning

1st Revel

2nd Revel

July Revel

August Revel

Saltcon

Outlands Coronet

October Notes

Beaste Feaste

Twelfth Night Revel

Court of Love

Burro Creek War I

1st Birthday Tourney

Kingdom Arts and Sciences

Turnabout Tourney

1st Outlandish Warlord

Shakercon

Grand Outlandish V

June Lunacy Revel

Courtesan's Challenge

Rustic Weekend

Guild Faire

Outlands Investiture

Storming of Storm Mountain

First Lagoon Demo

Dwarven Invitational I

Defender of Hastle Castle

Crown Tourney

Second Lagoon Demo

Shire Champion and Stolen Souls

Peasant Revel

Early Barony Years

The Questing Quill

Shire of Cwm Maethlon Newsletters

Ideas For Arms

And this is how it turned out:

Once upon a time, in the Land of Greatly Wasted Salt, three lovely ladies decided that living without protection from outlaws, brigands, and gatecrashers was not the best way to run a household. So they issued a classified proclamation, advertising for a defender, who would take their part against the nasties of a cruel, harsh world. Being ladies of unparalleled virtue, purity, and goodness, they immediately decided that no ordinary, sword-wielding clod would suffice. Therefore, in order to fill the position, the applicants had to be gentlemen of varied talents, in addition to being excellent fighters. ("It's so tedious to have a lord who does nothing but kill, kill, kill, all the time.")

From all over the principality they came; King, Prince, Viscount, all came vying for the honor of defending the four young beauties (the original three having adopted one from another fairy tale), and on the 12th day of August, A.S. XIII in the Grove of Fond Memories, the competition began. Handicrafts, ranging from sculpture to cookies (?), were judged, as were the courtliness of the candidates, their talents in kissing hands (female ones!) and the price their box lunch fetched at the auctioning-off. The fighting was hard and chivalrous (as befitted the occasion) and Master Gunwaldt, Lord Ostermachen M.D. (Monster of a Dwarf) was victorious over all comers.

Competition resumed after a short respite at the Transient Hovel Park, where the four lovely beauties tested the prospective defenders' ability to perform for their enjoyment and offer compliments, against the moment when their spirits would need an "ego-boo." After much wise deliberation (and consulting with the multitude on the sly), the ladies spake thusly: "We find that, (of the assembled noble gentlemen) Sir Robert de Spencer is unsurpassed in handicrafts, courtliness, and dying nobly on the Field of Honor, while James of Penmore has no peer in his efforts to kiss the hands of fair ladies. Hiltz of the Common House prepared a lunch that was far from common, and Squire Cormack na Gunn (and company) performed a humorous song that was the best by far. But, verily, Master Gunwaldt did so distinguish himself, both on the field of battle and at our feet as a complimenter, without equal, that we have no choice but to choose him as our Defender."

Thus did the ladies of Hastle Castle, long beset by perils, find the man (dwarf?) of their dreams, and almost lived happily ever after. But alas, their defender dwells many leagues away, and can only defend one lady personally. However, since this is an anachronistic fairy tale, the would-be meanie who would cause discomfort to any lady of Hastle Castle would do well to remember the properties of a far-speaker and the love in which a dwarf holds his ladies.

          The End (?)
          Submitted by Michael, the Lucky

At the Hastle Castle Tourney Genevieve de Waterwood, Charles of Galway, and Bevin of a Thousand Songs received their Awards of Arms. List of Grace was received by Lady Leah de Spencer and Squire Cormack na Gunn received the List of Chivalry. Thorad presented a viking ship to Master Gunwaldt upon which I am sure they will have many a happy voyage (if slightly cramped). And the Shire presented the King and Queen and Prince and Princess (to be given her at a later time) with salt and salt cellars.

From The Questing Quill, Vol. II Issue IX, September, A.S. XIII

The inimitable Friar Orison wrote an epic poem about this whole affair. We didn't think, as we were planning this event, that it would be rather embarrassing for the ladies involved--how would you like to spend the whole day having people compliment you, kiss your hand, and fight for you--but at your request? On second thought, though the event was embarrassing, it was nice, too. (There were some very scrumptious men vying for Defender of Hastle Castle.)